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Hey there.  What’s up, cutie?  I missed you.   What?  No, don’t be like that. You know you’re special to me.  No, don’t turn away.  I did it for you.  I did it for us.   I know we’ve been apart for so long now, but that’s doesn’t mean you weren’t always in my heart.  It’s just that… I had to make myself better for you.  For us really.  You’ve been on my mind this whole time.  Let me explain.  (cue “Two Out of Three Ain’t Bad”).

So, I’ve been away from his blog for a long time and my life has gone through a major transition.  That transition included things that caused the need to reframe and take time away from the whole concept of what I post here, so much so, that I erased everything on here (as I’m sure you noticed).   I lost my most famed article on why I hate Janeane Garofalo, on the top sexual do’s and don’ts of the Cresh, of the need for everyone to stop telling younger generations about “the real world” and the need to stop folksy sayings in general.  And many people are heartbroken they’ll never read again about why the 37 dicks scene in Clerks resonates with so many men.   I’m getting misty just thinking about it. (Let’s all take a moment to poor out a little fruit punch Thunderbird for all of the articles that ain’t make it).

But the transition really has been massive. Let’s go over it, shall we.

Career Change

Okay, so this one isn’t completely accurate and I’m going to reveal something I never really revealed directly on this blog before.   I was a therapist in private practice for years and had an academic position on and off during the entire tenure of this blog.  Due to some things that happened in my therapist life, I decided to walk away (largely) from seeing clients.

The reasons for leaving therapy were numerous. I began to become disillusioned with the trend of the entire field, believing it generally is much more about the psychologist/psychiatrist and inside political bickering than it is about helping people.  I especially became disillusioned with how many of my colleagues wanted to be little sociologists that wanted to change the world in order to help individual clients, which wouldn’t have been so bad except that I have an advanced degree in sociology and so know that half of their theory is outdated, at best, or completely wrongheaded all together.  Also, there was just a fatigue being in a discipline that has so few firm answers to anything.  It grates on you.

But more than anything, I just decided I didn’t want to spend the vast majority of my life being around people at the worst points in their lives when the payout for them was going to be so low.  It’s kind of like when little kids say they want to be a veterinarian because they love animals so much. Another way to frame that is to say, “I want to spend my life surrounded by sick and dying animals, and I want to be instrumental in killing massive amounts of them.”  In the same way, you just want to be around something that’s moving forward and exciting instead of being around such a downer constantly.

I’m not completely out of it, and in my new field, I’m using my bonafides as muscle to move myself around, but seeing clients is going to become a complete thing of the past for me.


New House, Boom!

A while back, I bought a new house, a bigger one than I had.  And as I usually do, I went crazy fixing it up to specifications.  It seems like something simple, but I really did remodel a whole lot of it.   It’s the bees knees.  I’m all domestic…and shit.



For a long time, I said I would not get married until homosexual men and women had the right to marry as well.  Thanks a lot, Supreme Court.  You fucked my argument.

And so it came to pass, that Elias got married to a wonderful woman that he wrote about on this very blog before his first date with her.  I wrote about how we never fought and how we get along really well and just seem to be on the same wavelength about life.    A bit of time later, and not one single thing has gotten worse.  We still don’t fight.  We still like the same kind of porn are on the same wavelength.  It’s been….well, I guess it’s how I thought marriage should be, but never really thought was in the cards.  Go figure.


Computers Computers Computers!

The new career I’ve endeavored into is web development (of which, yes, I’m bringing my therapist expertise).  A lot of the time spent away from the blog was in order to learn massive amounts of coding and web-based languages/applications/frameworks/etc.  When I learn something, I tend to go a bit crazy and learn it to the nth degree.  Being so busy with my shrink ways, there wasn’t much time already to invest in a new field, but I was determined to learn, so ….bye bye blog, I guess.

Why web-development?   I love technology already, but more fundamentally, there’s just something satisfying with being able to put a bunch of code into a file and then make something undeniably real come into existence on a screen.  There are good ways and bad ways to do web development, but if you don’t have it at least a little right, it doesn’t work at all. There’s something reassuring about having an undeniable right answer be available in the world. In fact, when some of my web colleagues give me a hard time about my coding, I’ve often responded with, “Hey! Do you see the site? Yes? Does it work? Yes? Then shut the fuck up.”


The Sickness Ordeal

I’ve had more than one relative in the time that I’ve been away be in dire need of critical care. And me, with my resources and knowledge, have been the one to turn to by other family members.   It’s a curse and a blessing, but I’m glad that I’m in that position.  Sickness just play sucks, and the help I’ve provided does seem to have had a positive affect.  I’m happy to note that none of the sickly relatives are as sick as they were anymore and nobody has died.


And that’s where I’ve been, baby.  You know I was thinking of you the whole time and I want to be with you forever.   As I’m getting into my new field more and more, I realize that, woah, I have a bit more time than I did being and academic and constantly talking to people dealing with very serious and real problems all the time. Who knew.

But that means I’ll be around a bit more.   Stop by, say hi.  Maybe give Elias a smooch on cheek. You know you can’t stay mad at me, baby.


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